No Credentials, Just Opinions: My Movie Rating Scale
A highly unscientific system based on vibes and rewatches
I recently saw “Project Hail Mary”, and Adam Zsolnai encouraged me to do a review! Before I do that, however, I wanted to introduce the readers of my page to my movie review scale.
I have no authority to rate movies. I have never taken a class in film, and do not have a degree in film, so take my reviews with a grain of salt. However, ever since I have begun writing on Substack, I have realized that writing about films and motherhood has unlocked the only time in my life I have enjoyed writing. I have grandiose dreams that someday I may make revenue off this account, but I am enjoying it so much that even if I don’t, that will not ruin the experience for me. If nothing else, I have the macabre peace of mind that if something would ever to happen to me, loved ones would at least be able to re-experience my voice through this page… (wah, wah, wah)
Moving onto the scale! I have so many reviewers that I have enjoyed watching over the years, including Red Letter Media, Double Toasted, Lindsay Ellis, Jenny Nicholson, and even Nostalgia Critic way back when. I suppose I took most inspiration from Double Toasted, I love how their rating scale is focused on phrases rather than numbers, it gives you the feeling you are receiving recommendations from a friend rather than a reviewer.
I will also include my Top 10 favorite films here, in case you would like to peruse to determine if my opinion even matters to you, or we simply have different tastes. I have an ongoing list of my Top 30 Movies in the notes app on my phone, which I routinely edit. These are in order, which was PAINFUL to decide. The metric I decided to go by was number of times that I have seen each film, as the more I have rewatched, the more I enjoy:
Top 10 Movies
1. The Dark Knight
2. Batman Begins
3. There Will Be Blood
4. Game Night
5. Red Eye
6. V for Vendetta
7. Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves
8. Princess Mononoke
9. The Scarlet Pimpernel (1934)
10. Hunchback of Notre Dame
Ack, I am excited! I really enjoyed making my scale and look forward to using it in the future.


As someone who has no creditentials when it comes to film criticism as well, this scale is great!